A bomb-proof relationship, do you have it?
It is quite common to have a lot of doubts and worries regarding our romantic relationships because we often feel insecure and need constant validation regarding our partner's commitment and love.
But you can stop worrying if you are sharing a healthy relationship where there is mutual love and respect.
And how do you measure whether you have this or not?
Do a quick check over these 11 key points and, if necessary, ask yourself why some of these essential requirements seem to be lacking.
You know you are living in a bomb-proof relationship, when:
1) You give naturally without expecting an immediate return because you know that what you're giving has the power to brighten your partner’s life and a smile of gratitude will be enough.
2) You love your partner for who they are: you love to study their attitude and behaviours, to register their expressions, their mood swings, you feel amused when they are slightly angry, you are over the moon for their victories and you are prompt in offering your attention and care when they are bruised; you don’t want to change a single thing about them.
3) You want to create a safe space for you, a sort of “safe haven”, to play out your complicity, to share your secrets, your tears of anger and joy, your tenderness, your confessions and intimacy.
4) You are able to experience any clash as an opportunity for discussion and growth, an opportunity to learn something about yourself, to understand where you are vulnerable, where your soft spots are, what you're passionate about and what makes you feel reactive.
5) You have a common vision regarding the future and your individual goals aren’t reasons to compete, but instead part of your shared life plan. You share many values and you know how important working in a team is.
6) You communicate on all levels, you are not afraid to vocalise or show your tenderness and affection; you love sex as a deeper body communication that brings you even closer to the person you love the most.
7) You are not worried to grow, to achieve your dreams, to fill your needs, without waiting for the other to drag you back or fill in for you. You are taking full ownership of becoming a better person in your life and in your relationship. You are willing to give, but you are never afraid to ask too.
8) You do not judge their choices as something personal. You let them face their own vices and weaknesses, sharing your opinion, but not trying to manipulate them to do something that pleases you, because you know that they are the one that has to deal with the consequences of their choices.
9) You know the power of apologising and forgiving, not for playing the martyr, but because you really believe in them. You know that making mistakes is part of the life game and forgiving is an amazing tool that allows you to lift weight off your shoulders and heal your broken heart quicker.
10) You dare to say "I love you" out loud every time you feel it in your heart without worrying about seeming weak because you are sharing your feelings so openly.
11) You can’t wait to spend time together, enjoy a movie, a book, an evening, a trip, a new adventure… Your time together is a beautiful gift that you give to each other without caring about the quantity. This can happen randomly or very often but every time it happens it is something that makes you feel like you are expanding, growing and becoming immensely happy!