My 2017 began with a rather specific question: "how can I become different and thereby create different results in my life?" I chose this question to be the soundtrack of my days. What I have realised over the past weeks though is that most people do not fully understand the preciousness of this question. And then I thought: the added value I can offer to anyone who will have the patience and the pleasure of reading my blogs during this year will be just that – to explain, month after month, the meaning of this choice and why it is so powerful.
Let's start by talking about the sense of responsibility. We are not used to considering ourselves fully responsible for our lives. We constantly invent excuses for why things do not work as we would like and who is to blame. It’s quite normal to do so, because we were brought up and educated in a punitive culture that says "who is wrong has to pay" ... " sinners go to hell" ... "God punishes those who do not respect the commandments" It is not surprising then that one of the biggest fears we have developed is related to making mistakes or being accused of something. With such a default mindset it is very easy to believe the lie that “what happens in our life is outside of our control”, that “what is wrong is always the fault of others” or that “things happen to you”. With this mindset you easily feel a victim of the system, a slave of the rules, and the best thing you can do is to learn how to ward off the blows and stay afloat.
A life of mere survival, where the smart ones seem to be the ones that come out best. In fact, it suits our economic and social structure to have people who believe this. Because those who feel weak or powerless are easily manipulated by another person or idea. This is your everyday reality, isn’t it? You constantly complain that things are not working, but since you consider yourself free of impact and accountability you expect that someone else is going to change them for you. And so you leave a lot of space and power to those who know how to continue to make you feel weak and helpless.
The truth that no one has educated you in (because of ignorance or malice) is that your life is the constant product of your choices or of choices you are not making. You may be aware of this or not, but in every moment of your existence you are creating your future and the flavour and colour of this future will depend on the quality of the thoughts and of the energy you are using to create it now.
Our existence is indeed an exquisite personal story that develops around the quality of the thoughts, words and habits that we repeat. We are always responsible for our results, sometime co-responsible, when we interact with someone else inside personal or professional relationships. Becoming aware of this opens you up to a universe of possibilities that you never considered achievable. As Henry Ford once said "whether you think you can, you can; whether you think you can’t, you can’t”.
You have the power and the responsibility to create a life that represents yourself. Such power and responsibility does not derive from philosophical theories; instead, they are a result of the energy and quantum structure of the universe in which you live, in junction with the biological, physiological and neurological features of your brain. These are concepts that became familiar to the public in the last 20 years. As always, knowledge is power. In this case, personal power.
How to learn to live in a way that represents yourself is what I will continue to guide you through the next episodes of this blog.
For now, I would just like you to stop believing in hell. The purpose of your life is not to get away from responsibility, but to embrace it with your whole self. Responsibility is not a negative. Becoming response-able is to become used to responding to situations and opportunities in a way that honours yourself and your own personal truth.
This word is beautiful and powerful, as are you.
(Pic courtesy - Helen K for Flickr)